G’day
Blokes & Shielas,
I’ve
decided to have a chinwag (have a chat) with you today about good old Aussie
slang. Now the reason I have chosen this
topic is to help out my Canadian teacher Ms. Thibault as she has chosen to come
down under and have a burl (give it a go) at teaching us ankle bitters a thing
or two. But I reckon (believe) by now she may think we are not the full quid
(unintelligent). But no worries, I hope
by the end of this chat she thinks we are all little rippers (great) and not of
our rockers. She may even give me a
beaut score cause she won’t know what I’m on about.
Aussie
slang has been taken from convicts to bush rangers to the First World War and
have emerged to reinforce a sense of National Identity and character.
Struth!
(exclamation) You wouldn’t think these words mean so much but sure as eggs they
do. Aussies use slang for humour wit and
rhyme to describe experiences of this colourful land.
For
example, get a load of this.
There
was this Bonzer (great ripper) Canadian chick whom decided to take a job in the
lucky country teaching some rug rats how to read and write. She quick as sticks packed her bag with some
skirts, blouses and trousers and a couple of pairs of heels. OH BOY … was she in for a rude shock, someone
should have told her that all she’ll need is some cozzies (swimming costume),
thongs (flip flops), singlets (tank tops), flannies (flannelette shirt) and
tracky daks (track suit pants).
She
lobs into Bris Vegas (Brisbane/Gold Coast) to find herself left stranded as her
ride has done the Harold Holt (past Prime Minister who when for a swim and
never came back). Stranded like a drongo
(stupid person) she was mad as a cut snake (really mad). She decided to find a boozer (pub) and have a
coldie (beer). Taking a possie (seat) at
the bar she gave her order to the dipstick (idiot) and she noticed he was built
like a brick out house (brick shit house) and found herself starring like a
stunned mullet (bewildered). “They don’t
make them like this in Canada!” she thought.
After scoffin (drinking back) a few plonks (cheap wine), Mrs. Thibault
found herself hav’n a rip snort’n time with the local Yobbo’s (a stereotypical Aussie; beer in
one hand, meat pie in the other, generally drive crappy old Holdens and have a
dozen mullet clad kids following them. By-products of alcoholic fathers) She was choccus (munching) on
sangas (sandwich) and booze and thought she’d better rack off (push off) before
she made a raw prawn (embarrassment) of herself with these fellas. She realized she stands out like a shag on a
rock (very obvious) and didn’t want these larrikins (harmless pranksters) hav’n a lend of her (to take advantage of
someone’s gullibility) .
By
some stroke of luck, Mr. Barid (schools vice principal) finally turns up to
pick her up. After driving for hours
they are within cooee (nearby) of Inverell and Ms Thibault is beginning to
think they are WAY beyond the black stump (the back of nowhere)
Mr.
Baird is a bonzer bloke (great friend who’s male) so he opens the car door for
her, “Careful you don’t come a gutzer (drunk) on the Bunyip (mythical outback
creature – the koala) ”.
“What
the???” Ms Thibault shouts.
The
next day everyone is flat out like a lizard (busy) drinking getting ready for
school but Ms Thibault felt like chucking a sickie (calling in sick) cause she
has a killer headache, but not wanting to be a piker (someone who doesn’t want
to fit in socially), she gathers her stuff and went to meet the kids.
The
moment she meet the rug rats, she knew she was in for a dead set rip snort’n
year (really good time).
Crikey
(OMG)!! That was a gobfull (verbal abuse) wasn’t it? Anyway, Ms Thibault I guess I have left you
quite gobsmacked (astounded) and here’s hoping for an Ace score!
Sophie
M
